Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

What I am about to say could very well be "massaged out" and explained in much more depth. There are so many things to pull out of this text. I, however, am writing a blog not a book. Maybe this will get your gears turning. So cherish the brevity and dig in further if you'd like.

In scripture we learn about two types of love and grace that God has for humanity. The first type of love and grace we learn about is what is called common love or common grace. Simply put this love is common to all of humanity, wicked and righteous (Matthew 5:43-48). The second kind of love we learn about is His love for His covenant people (Ephesians 1:4-5). This special and particular love and grace He only gives to His chosen ones and is rooted in the good pleasure of His will alone.

So, what's the deal with Ephesians 5? Well, as I was studying the scriptural teaching of what theologians call limited or definite atonement (the scriptural teaching that Christ didn't die for every single individual on the face of the planet but that He died only for the ones the Father elected before the foundation of the world - Ephesians 1) I began to think about Ephesians 5 and how this correlates with the special redeeming love that God has for His elect.

Some brothers and sisters would say, "No way! God loves everyone equally! There are no distinctions in His love." Really? Are you sure you want to say that? Doesn't Ephesians 5:25-33 say plainly that we, in the covenant of marriage, are to model our love after the love that Christ has for every individual His church (the strike through is intentional for a point).

If the commandment in Exodus 20:14, "You shall not commit adultery" is to be taken literally - doesn't that imply special, particular love for someone? This love is not promiscuous. Neither is the love that the Apostle Paul tells us to model in Ephesians 5 in the covenant of marriage. So why would anyone think that God's love is promiscuous? I believe the reason is that we are more driven by emotion than the word of God.

I would submit to you that if God loved everyone equally, without categories, distinction, or intentionality, then the commandment is vanity and I am free to go sin my heart out in every godless adulterous relationship I can find. The very basis for a special, particular love in a marriage is based upon the special particular love that Christ has for His church! Otherwise God's commandment in Exodus and Ephesians is just some arbitrary law that He made up with no basis in His nature.

But God is gracious and has a particular redeeming love for His people. This love touches the soul. It's not promiscuous love that is thrown around to everyone indiscriminately. It's not a love that is given in vain and only found to be true when the other party reciprocates. It is personal, free, full, mysterious and infinitely more glorious than any expression of it in an earthly marriage. We are wed to Christ. Our bridegroom is faithful. His love is pure and for His bride alone.

I thank you Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that your love is not promiscuous! May this special love be the delight of my soul now and forever more.

Amen and amen!